Thursday, May 24, 2007

That'll flat git it!

So, last installment I said I'd get down to business about Autry Inman. To be honest, there's really not all that much information on this Florence, Alabama native who started off doing the rockin' hillbilly thing and ended up punching out adult comedy LPs or squirreling around as a member of the Grand Ole Opry. He is listed in the Alabama Country Music Hall of Fame and apparently holds the record (where?) for "most songs written and recorded in a single year." He was also on the bill for Mr. Lovesick Blues' "lost" Charleston show!

The only album I own by Autry is a self-titler put out the Mountain Dew label from 1963 and is two sides of real bummer, berzerko and reluctant self-isolation. A peak on the back jacket of the LP may lend a clue as to the awkward beauty of this songwriting fool:

Autry Inman is very active in uraniam mining. Several years ago, he discovered the valuable mineral on his property and has spent a good deal of time in developing his claim. Between his mining venture, his personal appearances, Autry Inman still finds time for other things. A little known fact about Autry Inman is his tremendous success as a composer. He has written hundred of "hit" songs. These songs have been recorded by name artists both in the popular and country field.

URANIUM MINING?! Tracks that stand out as somewhat testament to Autry's possible overexposure to radiation may include "I lost you when I found you," Standing in the shadows," The darkest corner," and "We couldn't get together on the time." I don't know where I was going with that but like I said, I've yet to hear any other stuff by the guy which, in the computer age, is no excuse when I could set up some file sharing thing, but that's just too much for my attention span to manage right now. The shape of his head may also give away his hobby.

Speaking of which, it's great to read articles like this, with quotes like:

"The U.S. Army's not going to pay the bill for you to get on MySpace and YouTube," said Maj. Bruce Mumford, of Chester, Neb., who is serving as the brigade communications officer for the 4th Brigade, 1st Infantry Division, in Iraq. "Soldiers need to know what they can and cannot do, but we shouldn't be facilitating it."

I guess it's justifiably so when you take into consideration articles such as this. Normally, I don't mind getting screwed from out of nowhere, but this, among many, many other pertinent things, is really something every Joe Schmoe should get to know before blindly praising our "freedoms" and extolling the supposed virtues of this country stolen outright to begin with, while sharpening the blade of xenophobia on the bloated whetstone of fast food, strategically inefficient automobiles mass-churned during times of pre-emptive warmongering, cologne and, of course, Crocs, visors and Bud Light.

But I digress. It's not the sheeple who are to blame, if anyone is, but there painfully obviously isn't enough questioning of the total crap that parents unwittingly lay on their offspring and grind into their psyches, the same putrid one-dimensional blindfold which was laid on them when they were offspring and so on until the picture is truly gotten. And modern American "culture" does nothing but reinforce these inherently boring yet ultimately insidious "lessons."

Eff Boosh; leave me behind, robot!


R D Hardcore said...

maybe he listened to too much Warren Smith "Uranium Rock."

Eduardito Dinero said...

wow. i wish i knew what you were talking about because it sounds interesting

Kyle said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kyle said...

love it or leave it redneck!

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